Project Peppe

[89pajero]

I feel sorry for your truck. Love the story though. Is your insurance company still paying out for all the damage you do to the truck?

[1000dollamitzy]

Thanks Guys, nice to know my work is appreciated

That series 1 Landy is

Damm straight its inspiring, wonder if i can shoehorn a V8 into Peppe......

What he forgot to add was the bit after the run where he has poor peppe parked up in my shed and his
Quote:

long suffering wife
rocked up to pick them up and he had to tell her.....
here is the illustrious author head down fidgeting like a school boy who's been caught doing some thing he knew he shouldn't have done
I'm laughing and taking the piss because even tho he's trying to look contrite he had a huge grin

Yer the long suffering wife wasnt overly impressed, no nooky that night

I feel sorry for your truck. Love the story though. Is your insurance company still paying out for all the damage you do to the truck?

Yer me too. Will talk to Frankie the wonder mechanic before i talk to the insurance company to find out if it needs to be fixed for the warrant. i am not too keen to make a full claim again so soon as the insuracne companies benevolence will only stretch so far before they tell me to take a long walk off a short pier. So might get any panel work fixed myself this time and just get the insurance to fix the wondow under glass cover. or maybe bugger the insurance, chop the top off, stick a big V8 under the bonnet, 35 inch tyres and bung it on a trailer......

[Dr_PC]

chop the top off, stick a big V8 under the bonnet, 35 inch tyres and bung it on a trailer......

Nah keep in road legal the stories are far better. The bright side was you never got it stuck in a hole

[1000dollamitzy]

No, i did get it stuck in a hole, just it was sunny side up for a change....

[1000dollamitzy]

“I’ll be back by 3pm to put the roast of for tea.” I told Mrs 1000dollamitzy as I sauntered out the door just after lunch. We were just going down the river for a bit of a play for an hour or so.

What I should have said was “Honey I love you, but me and a couple of my closest mates are going on an adventure to the most dangerous 4WD area in the southern hemisphere and we may not get out alive. If I’m not back in three days you can probably safely cash in that huge insurance policy you have out on me and go shoe shopping. Oh and by the way one of the kids is coming....”

So me and the boy jumped in Peppe and drove the 2km to the Guppy Road entrance of the Tutaekuri River.

At first everything was going swimmingly, myself and Mr Ice were playing along the river bank, nothing to dangerous or sticky, then we caught up with some of the other lads from the shed...

Buzz leaned out the window of his HiLuxus and said “We found the best hole, it took us 2 hours to get my truck out of it!!”

Well now that sounded like fun, so off we trotted down to the far end of the river to a small bog that from the sound it might have been made of gorilla glue.

It looked innocent enough, wasn’t really that big, and just looked like a slightly damp bit of sand on the bank of the river. However as we all know in 4WDing, looks can be deceiving. I mean lets face it, some of us look intelligent and we know that just isn’t the case most of the time!!!!

Anyway I lined up Peppe, hooked second gear and stuck my foot to the floor, got about 6 feet into the bog and stopped dead in my tracks with all four wheels spinning uselessly in quicksand.

This was really nasty stuff, made up of water and that really fine silt that sticks like s$%t to the bottom of your shoe. Not too worry, hooked the snatch onto my new rear hook, a couple of tugs and I was out.

Then Mr Ice made his second fatal mistake of the day (the first was driving a Rangie.....just kidding ) and said in his fateful English accent “do ya think I shoold have a goo?”

“Bloody oath” we all cried as one, always keen to see a pom stuck in the mud.

So Mr Ice lined up and gunned the mighty V8 Rangie into the bog with as much gusto as he could manage. To his credit he must have made it a 3rd of the way in before his wheels hit the foundations of a high rise apartment block in Beijing and came to a grinding halt. And we all cheered!!

“I think I’m a bit stoock” lilted our antipodean friend.

No problems well just pull you out we chimed. However Mr Ice didn’t have a proper hook on the back of his truck yet and pulling a two ton Rangie out of cement with the tow ball was going to be recipe for disaster, so we figured we would christen the nice shiny new hooks on the front instead and pull him the rest of the way through.



All good we thought, except the bog just got deeper as it went on and we made another fatal mistake (experience is a great teacher...) we hooked the snatch strap onto the hook that his winch hook was sitting on. This had the effect of pushing the snatch strap to the outer edge of the hook, which was fine until it really started loading up and the extra leverage straightened the hook out so it now looked like a pointy finger thing sticking out the front of the truck. This also unfortunately left the truck in the deepest part of the bog.....

So we had a few more goes and only succeeded in breaking the first snatch strap and digging some really spectacular holes in the bank of the river.

OK we thought lets give the winch a try. Unfortunately Mr Ice’s shiny new winch was not hooked up yet, so we figured that we would try the winch on the safari. Nope that was pretty well buggered from pulling Buzz’s HiLuxus out, onto plan C.



At this point My Ice started to not look so cool, calm and collected, in fact he was starting to look decidedly un-Icy.....

Well to cut a long story short 2 ½ hours, and several more broken straps later we finally dragged him out of the bog to the cheers of the now assembled crowd of people watching and laughing.

This was a good thing as it was now well after 3pm and I figured if I didn’t get home soon I would be in serious trouble with my long suffering wife as we had people coming around for dinner at 5.30pm and the roast was still not on.

Then the we realised that all of the air had gone to the top of one of Mr Ices tyres, at this point Mr Ice was getting very stressed as he was supposed to be at a BBQ at 3.30pm and if he didn’t get home soon Mrs Ice was going to freeze hell over.

So a quick change of tyres and we were away, or so we thought.....

300m up the road the Rangie all of a sudden came to a screeching halt with all four wheels locked up. It looked quite spectacular I have to admit, but something was terribly wrong...........

Figured I would txt Mrs 1000dollamitzy and let her know that I might be a little late and could she get the roast on....

The initial prognosis was a blown front diff, so off came propshaft’s etc, but still it wouldn’t move, so I suggested I go get a trailer because there was no way the Rangie was going home under her own steam at this point.

So off I raced and borrowed the car trailer off my very understanding father in law. By the time I got back they had figured out it was the back diff that had given up its tenuous grip on life, so the rear half shaft was removed so that it could at least now be moved. So we dragged it up onto the trailer and set off for home.



I finally pulled into my driveway at around 6.45pm, only 4 hours late.... don't think any of us got sex that night...but by God it was worth it!!!!!!!

[ArvinSlayer]

that is gold lol!!!!!


Peace

Arvin

[basics]

don't think any of us got sex that night...

HAHAHA


good reading

[ice4x4]

All I have to say is....

BALLS!!



anyone got any 80 series axles they want to part with?

[petefj40]

Smiles ear to ear reading this thread. Cheers.
I'd say you and Mr Iceman would be good to get on the piss with.

[Dr_PC]

That very famous QUEEN Song, another one bites the dust, another great episode in the life of pepe.
Can't believe you have told the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Where is the hole you fell into, where is the canyon that gobbled up pepe just when she was about to ensure world peace?

[1000dollamitzy]

Smiles ear to ear reading this thread. Cheers.
I'd say you and Mr Iceman would be good to get on the piss with.

Yer except we are both grounded at the moment........

That very famous QUEEN Song, another one bites the dust, another great episode in the life of pepe.
Can't believe you have told the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

So help me God

Where is the hole you fell into, where is the canyon that gobbled up pepe just when she was about to ensure world peace?

Arrr yes world peace, well on the way to the canyon Peppe told me that there was a great conspiricy in the world and that in order to have world peace the bankers that currently own the world and run it for their own benifit would have to be taken out. But that one day Jesus would return and set to right all of the wrongs and injustices in the world

Bring on the day of judgement i say!!!!!

[G34R5]

Man Just love reading your stories of what not to do Really hope this isn't the end, there must be more stories coming haha and more mods

[Dr_PC]

Yer except we are both grounded at the moment........

Cant beleive that you are still grounded, must be another episode soon

[1000dollamitzy]

Yep grounding lifted, and the good wife finally let me sleep back in the bedroom again

But life got busy at moment, also Peppe needs a bit of work.....

And as these things go, typically i have run out of moola at this time of year to fix everything that needs fixing, but hopefully in the new year Peppe will be back up and kicking and ready for more adventure.

Unless of course i all of a sudden learn how to drive properly (unlikley lets face it ) or I have an arm shortening/pocket deepening operation and decide i cant afford this malarky any more (more likely to happen than learning how to drive..... ).

But fingers crossed all my boats make it back to shore early next year and we are up, up and away

Have a great Xmas everybody, do everything i wouldnt do and tell us all the stories after the hangover resides in the New Year!!!!!!!

[phraza]

Can't wait for the next chapter makes me want to record my trips like this!

[Paulballz]

Well i have read and heard some stories before, but this is pure gold...Awesome work..If only Peppe knew what she was in for it would of blown a head gasket and dropped piston before it left Tuis place

[G34R5]

Can't wait for the next chapter makes me want to record my trips like this!

Makes me want the same, they sound so .... adventurous haha cant wait for the next installment will really be looking out for it

[De-Ranged]

Well i have read and heard some stories before, but this is pure gold...Awesome work..If only Peppe knew what she was in for it would of blown a head gasket and dropped piston before it left Tuis place

His original one did

[1000dollamitzy]

The phone rang in a distinctly Jordy manner.....

It was Mr Ice.....

“Mee and Mrs Ice ave got a place in Oakoone to stay at in January, it’s too big for just os, soo you guys are coming too and we’ll doo tha 42nd traverse.”

“Sounds great” I replied, “except you still have two blown diffs from the last time we went 4wding together, and are you sure you discussed this with Mrs Ice???” I asked.




“Aye, I knooow, boot I can fix that” he said

“Fix what? The diffs or Mrs Ice?” I questioned

“Well booth, I’ve goot two spankin new diffs that arre bullet prooof, and I told Mrs Ice that your wife was coomin too, and that between the two of them they should be able to keep us from doing anything stupid”

“Crikey” I said “You must have laid it on thick for her to believe that line!!”

“Yer I did” he replied, “boot she was druunk at the time and said yes, and that’s all that matters!!”

And that was how the adventure began.

At this point it was the Friday evening before Christmas and we were due to cast off on the 4th of Jan.

This was a small issue as Peppe still needed new wheel bearings, new front diff seals, and a new window to be able to make the trip, and all this needed to happen while most of the country was on holiday.

Quickly I rang Frankie the Wonder Mechanic to see if he was working over the next two weeks. The answer as expected was “no”, but he was going to in the workshop on Monday so if I wanted to come down he could help me at least get the wheel bearings sorted.

Next I rang the insurance company and told them I needed a new window. The poor girl on the other end of the phone asked, “What happened to the old one?”

“A stone hit it” I replied

“But how can a stone hit the side window and break it?” she asked

“Weeellllllll” I said “The stone was lying on the ground beside a river and the truck sort of fell over and hit the stone and smashed the window”

Dead silence on the other end of the phone........

I think this was the point she began to question my sanity, but she approved the claim anyway and sent me off to Smith and Smith. Unfortunately all the wreckers were now closed for the holidays, so there were no windows forthcoming, so instead we made up a temporary one out of Perspex, much lighter....might have to replace all the windows with this.....

So with the wheel bearing and the window sorted it was just front diff seals that needed some attention. Unfortunately it was just not going to happen, so I just topped off the diff oil and figured I would do most of the trip in 2WD.

Finally the 4th of Jan arrived, I packed Mrs 1000dollamitzy and a couple of the sproggs into Peppe and was about to set off for the meeting point when the phone rang....

“Wev ad a small technical hitch” Mr Ice lilted up the phone line.

I immediately thought the worst, and figured that the Rangie had finally decided it had had enough and had dropped all its oil out on the pavement in protest to going 4WDing again. But no it was much worse!!!

“Mrs Ice as drooped er iPhone4 down the dunny”

I nearly wet myself laughing

“Aye, I ave too take er into town to get nother one or the iPhone wont be the only thing going down the shitter!!”

“No worries” I replied, “You do what you gotta do, let me know when you are on your way”

So a little later than expected we met up with Pruggerdore in his hightop whale and started heading over the Gentle Annie.

Everything was going swimmingly until I noticed that one of Mr Ice’s rear tyres was going rather flat. Then I noticed that the fuse for my brake lights had gone out again, so we called a quick halt to proceedings, put another fuse in Peppe and pumped up the tyre on the Rangie figuring that we would have a closer look when we got to Ohakune.

Upon arrival the rear tyre came off the Rangie and it turned out that at the same time he was smashing his diffs in the bog of doom he also gouged out the inside of the alloy rim with a stone enough that it had made a small hole in it, so the tyre went from 50psi down to about 15psi over the course of about 2 hours.

Bugger I thought, this wont be an easy fix on a Friday night in the middle of nowhere.

“Noo problem” Mr Ice said “I’ve goot some 2 pot steel putty n the back”

An hour later the rim was almost good as new, needless to say I was bloody impressed....



Pruggerdore had decided earlier in the day that his life wasn’t interesting enough already medically speaking and so slammed his thumb in the door of his Hiluxadore. So the nights entertainment included watching him drill a hole though his now throbbing thumb nail with a small lance.

Skip the next couple of pics if you are bit squeemish......





The next morning after a light breakfast of bacon, eggs, sausages, baked beans and black pudding we headed off to the start of the famous 42nd Traverse.



While doing a bit of research on the interweb thingy we discovered that the Auckland 4WD club guys were doing a bit of a run in there the same day, so we planned to meet up with them at around 10am. However as it turned out they were still stuck on the Auckland motorway when we got there, so after half an hour or so of waiting we figured we would leave them too it and headed off up the track.

The first bit was all very easy, just a dirt/shingle track, a bit bumpy in places, but no 4WD needed. Pruggerdore figured he would do the whole track in 2WD, I figured the same but seeing as I had Mrs 1000dollamitzy and the kids in the truck I would be better to stick it in 4WD where needed for safety reasons.....although I only put it in 4WD once for the whole morning.

I didn’t want to leave it in 4wd all the time as I didn’t want the diff to heat up too much so it sucked in huge amounts of water through my dodgy seals when we went through the river crossings, so there was a bit of jumping in and out of the truck sticking the hubs in and out for the slightly tricky bits.

We stopped at the first small river crossing at lunch time . There was a nice little water hole for the kids to all have a swim. And this was where the Auckland guys finally caught up with us. So a bit of hand shaking was the order of the day at that point.





Not long after lunch we struck our first bit of damage with Pruggerdore sticking a small hole in the whales plastic grill when an apparently soft looking Toe toe bush turned out to be hiding a rather solid tree stump.



Then not 5 minutes later a call came across the radio.

“Ive been attacked!!” Mr Ice wailed

“By what?” I shot back

“By the invisible ninja branch of destruction” Mr Ice replied “Its destroyed me wing mirror!!”

“Don't worry” I said “it’ll be cheaper to fix than your diffs were!!”

“Aye, it will at that” he replied



Finally to top off the string of slight mishaps Pruggerdore drove into a bank that jumped out in front of him and bent the front bumper on the whale just enough so it rubbed annoyingly on the tyre.



After lunch the track got a little more interesting with some nice river crossings



Some fantastic views





And some slightly narrower and steeper sections





The real surprise here is that apart from Peppe blowing fuses with ever increasing frequency (really must find that short...) I didn’t break anything, I didn’t roll it, I didn’t even put any more dents in her!!!!!

I have to say that this trip is a fantastic drive, the 4WDing is easy, even a complete novice would get through in a stock 4WD with ATs. In saying that however it hadn’t rained for a couple of weeks before we went through, so everything was dry.

If it had been raining heavily before the trip it would have made it considerably more interesting, hence the reason they shut the road in winter.

However before you go taking your brand new 100k Prado through there be warned it is a little scratchy with a lot of bush over hanging the track in places.

We pulled out of the track later in the afternoon and spent a little time trying to straighten Pruggerdore’s bumper



Then stopped to pump up the tyres when the tar seal started



Then finally stopped at the pub in Owhango for an icecream.



All in all a dam good days driving, I would recommend all 4WDing kiwis should do this trip at least once in their life, not because it is the most challenging track in the world, but just because it is a magnificent part of the country, just watch out for the mountain bikers, some of them seem to think they own the track.......

Here are a couple more pics

Me


Mrs 1000dollamitzy and a couple of the kids


bush clad track


Peppe on the bridge


Whakapapa river

[zukmeista]

Another awesome tale... Couldn't stop laughing when I read about the window falling on the rock!

[phraza]

Sounds good! I want to head down there one day soon and do this trip. Suitable for a day trip? (leave before sun rises)

cheers

fraser

[HomeBrew]

Bloody Awesome mate

[Dr_PC]

A)out of Perspex, much lighter....might have to replace all the windows with this

B)So the nights entertainment included watching him drill a hole though his now throbbing thumb nail with a small lance.

C)a light breakfast of bacon, eggs, sausages, baked beans and black pudding

D)I didn’t break anything, I didn’t roll it, I didn’t even put any more dents in her!!!!!

A) Perspex scracthes like you wouldn't belive, and breaks and shatters, Far better to use acetate
B) This brings back memories
C) Where were the tomatoes? A light breakfast like this requires tomatoes or its only a snack.
D) I think your full of __it, or did mrs1000dollamitzy buy you some 4wd driving lessons. The first part of this story was believeable then you had to go and turn it into a fairy tale.

Yes a track that I want to do one day for the very reasons you have stated.
Keep up the stories, as you can tell you are getting a following. Guess its good to have someone other than ourselve to laugh at.

[1000dollamitzy]

Sounds good! I want to head down there one day soon and do this trip. Suitable for a day trip? (leave before sun rises)

Would be a long day but doable, I know some of the Auckland 4WD guys came down that morning, but not sure if they went home again the same day. Took us about 5 hours to drive through, but we were taking it slow and enjoying the views etc, not to mention we had the kids so there were a few more stops. I would personally recommend staying at least the night before so you can enjoy the trip a little more.

[1000dollamitzy]

1000dollamitzy wrote:

A)out of Perspex, much lighter....might have to replace all the windows with this

B)So the nights entertainment included watching him drill a hole though his now throbbing thumb nail with a small lance.

C)a light breakfast of bacon, eggs, sausages, baked beans and black pudding

D)I didn’t break anything, I didn’t roll it, I didn’t even put any more dents in her!!!!!


A) Perspex scracthes like you wouldn't belive, and breaks and shatters, Far better to use acetate
B) This brings back memories
C) Where were the tomatoes? A light breakfast like this requires tomatoes or its only a snack.
D) I think your full of __it, or did mrs1000dollamitzy buy you some 4wd driving lessons. The first part of this story was believeable then you had to go and turn it into a fairy tale.

Yes a track that I want to do one day for the very reasons you have stated.
Keep up the stories, as you can tell you are getting a following. Guess its good to have someone other than ourselve to laugh at.

A) thanks for the heads up, must admit the perspex is scratched to hell already...

C) Bugger I knew we forgot something......better have a chat to Mrs 1000dollamitzy and give her a rev up......opps shouldnt have said that, hope she doesnt read this.....anyone got some eggs I can cook?

D) OK I admit that it is hard to believe I didnt break anything, but the only dent I got was in the bottom of the fuel tank guard, which is quite impressive considering it is made of 4mm plate steel....pleased I listened to Mr De-Ranged now

Finally, glad to be able to entertain you guys, been trying for years with the kids to no availe.....

[RobLucking]

loving this build thread.... look forward to more tails of Peppe's adventures

[G34R5]

absolutely loved the story haha cant wait for another as always been deprived of 4wd'ing for the past year after i couldn't afford to put yet another engine in the hilux haha so cant wait till i can get back out there

[turoa]

Thought I recognized the familiar looking rangie and paj heading up sh1 whilst on my way down it last friday. Was looking good and hope you fullas had fun

[kbushnz]

Another awesome tale... Couldn't stop laughing when I read about the window falling on the rock!

Yes I was reading it out to the Wife and we were both in tears at this point.
Great story and trip....

[1000dollamitzy]

I placed a couple of handfuls of cashew nuts in a container and threw them into a bag with a bottle of water, that should be enough I thought to myself, we were only going to go for a bit of a drive up the river for an hour or two, should be back by lunch time, nothing too strenuous.

Where have I heard that before I wonder……

10 minutes later Mr Ice turned up and off we headed to the monument to catch up with Pruggerdore. This was to be Pruggerdore’s first go at driving again since they took his brain out, patched up a hole in his head with some vulcanising fluid (bit like fixing a puncher he reckons…) and stuck his brain back in again. Thankfully the funny voices in his head had finally shut up a couple of days before hand, so he was good to go apparently….

Anyway seeing as simex extreme tyres are aren’t the best in soft shingle we parked up for a few minutes and let down the tyres to about 10psi.


That small chore sorted it was off to the river for a bit of a cruise. Pruggerdore had brought his good mate Delme with him so that if the funny voices started up again he could take over the driving, a good plan we thought.

The river was a bit soft in places but the going was pretty easy initially, and if anyone got stuck it was pretty easy to back out and have another go heading down stream a bit.

Pruggerdor having a rather more capable truck than me or Mr Ice was playing in several places that we thought better of, but without any mishaps.



Here are a few pics

Peppe and the Rangie


Pruggerdore stuck in a hole...


Pruggerdore backing out of said hole...


Pruggerdore making sure he doesnt get stuck in hole again......


Peppe being driven expertly through the river (Mr Ice got a bit stoock here )



Mr Ice getting a bit bogged in the river


Pruggerdore proving that the Hiluxadore CAN'T go everywhere...


Pruggerdore doing his impression of a speedboat.......



A Slightly deeper crossing



Really it all seemed to easy, everyone was having fun, no one was getting seriously stuck, and no one was breaking anything or rolling their truck onto its roof, really it couldn’t last………

Pruggerdore was feeling fine but figured that he would let Delme have a drive anyway, 5 minutes later there was that fateful call over the radio “Help were stuck!!!!!!”

“Wow” I thought how did he manage to get the hiluxadore stuck here? So I quickly spun around to head back to them. But as soon as I did a 180 I stopped, they where nowhere in sight….

“Where the heck are you??” I radioed back

“Just keep driving back” came the reply, “you can only just see the top of the truck above the river….”

Bugger……

So another few meters and sure enough here was the Hiluxadore looking rather sad sitting in the middle of the river with water flowing through the windows and a very embarrassed looking Delme sitting in the driver’s seat.



“Not to worry” I said, “it needed a wash anyway…”

Mr Ice then cruised up, “OOhhh great, I can try out my new winch”

So Peppe was dually attached to the back of the Rangie and the life preserver, sorry I mean winch rope, was tossed to the castaways.


A few minutes later the hiluxadore was back on solid ground, but rather soggy and definitely not in the going mood. So Pruggerdore did the next most important thing and emptied all the water out of his gumboots….notice the scar on the side of his head, and you thought I was joking about them taking his brain out……


Not to worry, Peppe to the rescue, the Hiluxadore was tied to the back of the mighty Peppe to drag the rest of the way out of the river.


Thankfully there was a quick exit not far away through the Holcim cement quarry, a very helpful loader driver showed us the way out. This was very fortunate because if we had had to drag the hiluxadore all the way back up the river we still would have been there at midnight…..

So we (relatively) quickly made our way back out the main road and dragged the hiluxadore back to our starting point.

Half way back however I got an uneasy feeling, looked in my rear vision mirror (the only one left on the inside…) and saw the distinct colourings of Her Majesties finest skulking up behind us. This wouldn’t have been a problem if any of the vehicles we were driving on the Queens fair highway were registered, warranted, or in anyway roadworthy, but of course sometimes these things get missed, or, as in Pruggerdore’s case, are completely impossible.

So after everyone soiling their daks thinking of the expensive fines we were about to incur (on top of the expensive repair bill that Pruggerdore already had…) and much to everyone’s surprise and bewilderment, said police officer raced past us and instead pulled up the guy in the brand new Toyota Corolla that had past us not a few moments before.

We couldn’t believe our luck, although it does make sense on some level, I mean let's face it, if you are dumb enough to drive a Toyota Corolla, really, you deserve to be pulled up and given a ticket for stupidity…….